Finding a Mentor in the 21st Century
Traditionally, mentors volunteer the wisdom of their experiences to help others who wanted to follow in their footsteps. These days, many people have learned to appreciate the value of a good mentor.
Therefore, we see messages on discussion boards asking, "Would someone be willing to mentor me?" Total strangers call, asking, "Will you be my mentor?"
You may get lucky. You begin a series of one-to-one conversations with someone you respect. Soon, the relationship has evolved into full-scale, helpful mentoring, with no effort on your part and no fees to pay.
However, you may find yourself paying in other ways. Mentors sometimes seek rewards not from money but from the satisfaction of seeing their protegés ("mentees") flourish.
They may become frustrated because, "You're moving too slowly!" or, "You're not following my suggestions!" And they may be reluctant to see you fly off on your own.
Regardless, just because someone's been successful doesn't mean she's the right mentor for you. Many resources are better at teaching than doing and vice versa. Some of the most successful professionals cannot articulate why they achieved so much and the path they followed may be closed to you.
Before you begin your search, ask, "What do I want from a mentor? Information? Moral support? Ongoing encouragement? And can I obtain these benefits by paying a coach or consultant? If I stumble across a mentor, will she be able to provide these benefits in a helpful way?"
And are you prepared to be a good mentee? Will you listen carefully, act on advice (or be prepared to explain why you won't), and express appreciation to your mentor? Will you avoid making unreasonable demands?
These days, mentoring tends to come with a price tag, and the service may be labeled "consulting," "coaching," or even "counseling." For example:
"Mervin" wanted to open a retail toy store. "Gwen" had found success with a similar store in a nearby town that resembled his own. Mervin offered to pay Gwen a thousand dollars to learn the business. Gwen accepted. Mervin now has his own successful store and he remains friends with Gwen.
"Hilary" wanted to set up a life coaching business. She found experts who would not be competitors and paid them for mentoring. There was a fine line, she says, between coaching and mentoring, and she paid the equivalent of coaching fees.
"Reginald" found a mentoring service that charged a monthly $200 fee, giving him access to experts who normally charged $500-$1000 per session.
These stories exemplify the New Mentoring, usually more effective than asking for help from strangers. A proactive approach allows you to identify the service you need, assess the would-be mentor's ability to deliver that service, begin and end when you choose, and avoid hidden costs. Focus on the benefits you receive, regardless of the label, and these days, be prepared to pay the going rate.
I offer one-to-one consultations on career strategy.
About The Author
Cathy Goodwin, Ph.D., is an author, speaker and career/business consultant, helping midlife professionals take their First step to a Second Career. http://www.cathygoodwin.com.
"Ten secrets of mastering a major life change" mailto:firstname.lastname@example.org
Contact: email@example.com 505-534-4294
This RSS feed URL is deprecated, please update. New URLs can be found in the footers at https://news.google.com/news
Matt Miller named new Montana State offensive coordinator in midseason coaching shakeup - Helena Independent Record
Hue Jackson jumping into offensive coaching won't solve Browns biggest problems | Jeff Schudel - News-Herald.com
Lessons from Donald Trump and The Apprentice: A Career Coachs Perspective
What can we learn about careers from watching Donald Trump and The Apprentice?1. Recognize that job tests don't always correspond to job realities.
The Non-Conscious Mind at Work. Harness it for Your Success
Thoughts are real things. As soon as you realize how to control your thoughts you are on your way to making vast changes in your daily success.
The Incredible Human Psyche
The intriguing Human psyche - more complex than the metamorphosing cocoon, and more phenomenal than the human brain could ever imagine.Deep within the realm of your subconscious is the centrifuge, or cerebral core of all Human possibilities.
The Magic of Hearing
I'm working on a coach training certification, and one of the "proficiencies" I'm expected to have mastered is "engages in provocative conversations." Now, that really got me thinking.
Coaching Skills Does Matter At Chick-fil-A
In this discussion, we talk about Coaching Skills with Phil Orazi, Dean of Chick-fil-A University and Scott Mayson, Business Consultant with Chick-fil-A in Atlanta, Georgia. Q - What is the role of an Operator at Chick-fil-A, and what are some of the challenges that an Operator faces?Phil - Operators are selected and are independent contractors for Chick-fil-A.
Do You Trust Your Mentor(s)?
It is better to suffer wrong than to do it, and happier to be sometimes cheated than not to trust." - Samuel JohnsonI was on a tele-seminar recently with International Health Coach Jeremy Likness and he asked a very interesting question about Trust.
What makes attitude so important? Why not just learn some "seduction techniques" to get the girl? The answer is simple: learning techniques (or having expensive clothing and cars) without improving your attitude is like wrapping a cheap gift in expensive wrapping paper. It still looks expensive on the outside, but when the girl "unwraps" you, she'll find out that you were faking it all along.
The Executive Coaching Contract
Having found a coach you feel comfortable and excited about working with, the next step is to discuss and sign the coaching contract or agreement. This is vital to ensure that both coach and client are clear from the outset about what is expected.
Should I Get A Coach?
Why should or would someone hire a life coach? Well, why would anyone purchase the services of a personal trainer, and interior designer or a sports coach - any professional "assistant" for that matter? After all, we all know how to exercise, how to hang a curtain and how to play our own game. But we hire a professional because we know that they will hold us accountable on our goals and objectives - and since we're paying good money for them to be there, often whether we show up or not, we have an added incentive to do so ourselves.
Moment of Magic
Laughter may or may not be a shock, relieved, but its' therapeutic effects are recognised in most cultures. It allows a positive distractive moment or moments.
Do You Want to Make More Money as A Life Coach
There's a lot of coaches out there not making any money, looking for opportunities, trying to model what others are doing, networking like crazy, researching, visualizing, affirming and hoping? yes, hoping that the clients show up before the bailiffs.I've been involved in Marketing and PR and worked with and met the good, the bad and the ugly of the coaching world and can honestly say if you are not making any money there is probably a reason why that I can help you with.
Business Career, Executive Coaching Article - Leadership: Understanding the Human Condition
"Nothing is more practical than for people to deepen themselves. The more you understand the human condition the more effective you are as a businessperson.
Poise, Posture, and Performance
Good posture is seen to have many advantages. From an aesthetic point of view it can enhance image, sending out the right signals (body language).
Viewpoints - Communication Destruction Or....
Viewpoints! Everyone has them and they are personal. However, when you believe that only your view is correct, you shut out other people and do not listen to the facts they are giving.
Beware of Psychic Vampires
I am often asked how I stay happy and motivated all the time. The answer has two parts to it; positivity and self-talk.
Top Ways to Maximize Your Talents at Work
Are you maximizing your strengths and promoting your talents at work? If you have sharp analytical skills, have you sought to apply those skills to your current job? I know it sounds crazy to ask for more work when you are already overloaded, but any assistance that you can provide now will ultimately help you advance in your present position or in a future one.You have gifts and talents to offer the world.
12 Reasons to Develop Exceptional People Skills
Why should you bother to spend your valuable time learning how to develop exceptional people skills?Here's why..
Unhook From The Perpetual Progress Grid
I have been a member of a group called the Women in Business Connection (WIBC for short) in Cambridge, MA for about four years. We get together for lunch meetings once a month.
Guilt: Is it Getting in the Way of Your Self-Care?
When Do We Usually Feel Guilty? When:We're not feeling ok about who we are.We're not feeling ok about the choices we're making.
What does this word really mean anyway? According to Webster's Collegiate Dictionary, 10th Edition, discipline, as a noun, is defined primarily as punishment. My, but that has a harsh ring to it.
|home | site map|