|Grief & Loss Information|
How to Turn Grief into Joy
I was with my daddy when he died. Excuse me, I was with my daddy when his spirit left his body. I drove him to the emergency room because he was having chest pains. He said that they weren't too bad, and his color was good. He was still walking.
In fact, Daddy walked into the cubicle in the ER and hopped up on the gurney. Almost as quickly, he hopped off saying, "Whew, doggie! Feels like somebody's got a knife in my back, right between my shoulder blades." Daddy said it with a great big grin on his face. That's just the way my Daddy was.
A few minutes later his aorta ruptured spilling his lifeblood into his chest cavity. His lips quivered briefly as he said, "I'll see you in a little while."
The moment his spirit was free from his body, an ethereal serenity bathed the room and flowed out into the bustling hallway. The emergency department took on a surreal silence, as all motion and sound seemed to slow?then to stop. I was embraced by a joyous warmth so real that it was overwhelmingly palpable. We were no longer separate. Daddy's spirit enfolded and permeated my being.
Is there any way to retain your loved one's presence while navigating the valley of grief? Yes, there are some things you can do right away.
First, suspend your doubting mind. Whether you look at life after death spiritually, or logically as the natural culmination of evolution, or through the evidence of quantum physics, you come up with the same answers. Probabilities indicate that life continues after the death of the physical body.
Second, understand that your loved one is still here with you. Don't say, "Yeah, right!" Suspend your doubts. Go somewhere quiet; somewhere you can be alone, even if it's a closet. Close your eyes. Get still inside, and just stand there, or sit there and breathe. Give yourself a few minutes to calm yourself. And then imagine how you would feel with your loved one standing right beside you-so close that you can hear him breathe and feel his body heat. Pretend, if you will.
Your loved one has not "passed away" anywhere. In reality he's closer to you than your heartbeat. There's a thin veil between heaven and earth. Your loved one has simply passed through that veil. S/he can still hear you, see you, and touch you, but your physical body is a barrier to your being able to perceive your loved one.
Third, when you're quiet inside, ask him something simple like "Are you here with me?"
Ahh HAH! Where did that "Yes" come from? Inside your head? Well sort of, but there's more to it than that. Psychologists say that we all have an inner child and an internalized parent within us. In a similar way you have internalized your loved one. So what you hear are partly the characteristics of your loved one that you have internalized and partly the still living, growing, eternal character of your loved one surrounding you in the spirit world.
The body is a mechanical device powered by chemistry. The living, thinking, loving, remembering, planning, and dreaming part of you is LIFE, and it is eternal. Life cannot be destroyed. At the death of the mechanical, chemical body the eternal living consciousness of you is immediately aware of a sublime freedom. You are capable of seeing your spirit body for the first time. And it is exquisite.
Jesus called the afterlife "heaven." He said that it's "at hand" (Matthew 4:17). He also said that it's "within" (Luke 17:21). He called it "paradise." Jesus told the dying thief on the cross that he would be with Him in paradise today (Luke 23:43). That clearly indicates that there is no waiting period between life and the afterlife. Your loved one is in heaven, or paradise, right now. And that paradise is "at hand" and "within you."
The New Testament says that we have a natural body and a spiritual body (1 Corinthians 15:44). It says that the things we can see are temporary, but the things we cannot see are eternal (2 Corinthians 4:18). Jesus referred to the spiritual body when He said that people who live in Him and believe in Him would never die but have everlasting life.
As for the logical culmination of evolution, logic requires that there be an afterlife. Nature naturally selects the characteristics of living creatures. Qualities that insure survival are chosen over other qualities. If life ends at the grave, why have humans evolved so many qualities that they have little or no use for on earth? Altruism, charity, honor, patience, fidelity, etc. have little value in a society where materialism, war, and self-interest prevail.
Humility and service do not generate financial gain or the acquisition of power. They are a handicap, if anything. Yet, they persist as character traits in the majority of people. Man is driven more by abstractions like love, loyalty, accomplishment, curiosity and discovery than by simple biological directives. Why?
An unborn child develops arms, legs, eyes, and lungs because it will need them to function in the world into which it will be born. Man develops compassion, devotion, generosity, hope, understanding, and trustworthiness (to name but a few) because he will need them to function in the world into which he will be born when he leaves the physical body.
And in the same way that an unborn child is not separate from the world of his family, we are not separate from the loved ones that have passed through the veil.
And what if the quantum physicists are right? What if we really do live in a world with multiple dimensions?a holographic world? The mystics and the prophets have insisted that this world is an illusion for millennia. A holographic universe would mean that our bodies, our houses, our cities, and even the stars above us are a mirage. Those dimensions are all around us as the physicists are discovering, and those dimensions really do influence our world. What if other dimensions are the "mansions" that Jesus referred to?
Your loved one is still here with you. He's part of a dimension that you cannot perceive-yet. You are a spiritual creature having a human experience. You have spiritual senses that you can use to communicate with and become aware of your loved ones in heaven. It's done through focused prayer and meditation. In Matthew 5:4 Jesus said, "Blessed are they that mourn: for they shall be comforted." That's His promise. Believe it. Experience it.
©Copyright 2004 Robbin Renee Bridges
About the Author:
RobinRenee Bridges has been a chaplain and officer in The Sanctuary for more than thirty years. She is the author of "A Bridge of Love between Heaven and Earth: Self-Induced Contact in the Afterlife." For more articles about death, dying, and the afterlife visit her web site at: http://www.spirit-sanctuary.org
This RSS feed URL is deprecated, please update. New URLs can be found in the footers at https://news.google.com/news
What to do in Oklahoma on Sept. 6, 2018: Check out the opening reception for Janet O'Neal's 'One Thousand Tears' at ... - NewsOK.com
Afraid Of Dying? Afraid Of Living!
Over the years, I've heard many people voice their concerns of death and dying. It wasn't that they had any maladies that would cause them to die any time soon, but they were "afraid of their own immortality.
Dying On the Inside: A Childs Grief
The impatient tooting of a car horn startled us into awareness. No one had thought beyond making it through the grievous night.
During the two years of my husband's terminal illness, death was never far from my mind. We had been told he was dying and even a time in which it was supposed to happen.
Death of a Parent: Saying Good-Bye to Mommy or Daddy
Coping with the death of a loved one is never easy, regardless of how old you are when that loss occurs. For children who lose a parent, however, the effects can be devastating, indeed, and a plan will need to be put in place so that they can learn to accept this part of the life cycle and move on in a healthy, balanced manner.
How to Deal with Suicide and Euthenasia
The following is a report that indicates how you might recognize suicidals, and how you might deal with them. But a warning: Suicide can be a very complex issue, and it might be better to have a professional deal with this issue if it comes up, but if this is very difficult to attain, this guide is a very good alternative to follow if you have no other solution to the problem.
Online Monument - An Ever-lasting Tribute to Your Departed Loved Ones
Memories are never to be buried along with the loss of our very loved ones. To be forever remembered as someone whom we always love, they always should be.
Learning to Live Again
Overcoming death and beginning once again to live is the one thing that we never anticipate can happen after we have experienced death. The truth is however, that whether we like it or not life continues on.
Scared to Death of Dying and Denying Grief
When I invited Martha to the gathering at my house, she accepted the invitation cheerfully. Martha was new to the area and so I thought this small potluck I was hosting would be a chance for her to get to know other women in our town.
New Tears [about Grievng--with commentary]
New Tears [about Grieving]If it rains or shinesLittle does it matter so? Days, like tear drops-Slip and slide, and go.I sit looking out my windowLittle do I want to say-? Goodbye and close my brain;Not forever, anyway!.
Pet Loss: Significant and Profound Loss or Much Ado about Nothing?
For those who have deeply loved and lost their animal companions, the answer is obvious and yet disturbing. There are still far too many people in our culture who minimize and trivialize the loss of a pet.
The Lesson of a Mothers Death
Dedicated to my mother, FlorenceNovember 11, 1920 - May 25, 2005The Passing of the TorchShe lies in peaceful repose on her back with her hands, one atop the other, gently resting on her tummy. Those hands that loved to play the piano, taught me how to make the most delicious fudge, brushed my hair, held hundreds of books, gracefully parted the air during Tai Chi practice, pounded a career of typewriters, peeled logs in preparation for their new home, produced many a midnight sewing machine creation and, most importantly, held her children close to her heart.
We are the Reflection of our Lives: How to Survive Loss & Humility
Everyday, I look in the mirror to see the face staring back at me. Sometimes it is lined with stress, sorrow and grief.
One Womans Way of Dealing With Grief
All of us at one time or another have felt grief: perhaps over a lost job, lost love, or the most heartbreaking, the death of someone we loved dearly. Each of us goes about the task of grieving in our own distinct way.
Suicide in the Church, Part 3
Moving Beyond Grief and Loss
In my work as a coach and therapist, I have seen many clients dealing with losses of all kinds-loss of loved ones through death and divorce, for instance. These experiences are difficult for everyone.
You Can Help A Grieving Heart
Oh, we can talk about the best cold medications and if cherry cough syrup tastes better to kids than orange. We can recommend preschools and sneakers.
How to Deal With A Death in the Family and Still Run Your Small Business
As a small business owner we have to deal with tax law changes, local ordinances, environmental laws, Worker's Compensation, etc. Just when we thought we had everything under control, something terrible happenes.
A Critical Assessment of Euthanasia
The question of whether, say, a man should have the right to take away his life granted pain and suffering have overcome him is a very important question today. A different way of putting this question is this: 'Should a man have the right to take away his life if he ceases to function as a human being?' This matter would have been laid to rest had it not been that it strikes at the heart of law, key matters of health, and morality.
Present Moment Awareness: Lessons From My Dog
I've always waited for the perfect moment to be happy: As though time were a flower waiting to bloom. My scruffy puppy-happy senior dog knows better.
The Encyclopaedia Britannica (1999 edition) defines empathy as:"The ability to imagine oneself in anther's place and understand the other's feelings, desires, ideas, and actions. It is a term coined in the early 20th century, equivalent to the German Einfühlung and modelled on "sympathy.
|home | site map|