Happiness Information


Getting To The Root Of Unhappiness


Many people live in clutter, emotionally eat themselves into overweight, live in debt, hate their jobs and otherwise live unhappy lives, unable and seemingly unwilling to change. Why? What do these have in common? What is the core issue?

Fear, or rather an absence of love.

Fear, and not hate, is the "dark side" or opposite/absence of love, the way darkness is the opposite/absence of light.

Whether your self image is controlled by unhealthy or uncontrolled overweight or fanatic perfection, both stem from fear. In the first, food is used to comfort upset emotions and to retreat into - a true friend that never lets you down. In the latter (and sometimes the former), control over the body supplants a loss of control elsewhere in life, eventually taking over that life.

Clutter is almost always fear-based - fear of not having something and needing it, fear of getting rid of something important, fear of leaving oneself open to new experiences (which can't come in because your house - and by extension your life - is already full) and fear of being alone with oneself and one's thoughts (clutter requires so much of our energy to deal with and work around, it can serve as a sort of mental static to keep us too busy to think about important things).

Debt is another symptom of fear - people get into debt for many fear-based reasons (like needing stuff to make themselves feel better, or for fear of not keeping up with the Jones' and being socially outcast). Another part to this equation is that many people will not get rid of their access to credit (cut up cards, etc) because there is always that "what if an emergency happens and we don't have cash on hand to pay for it?" which is made moot by the fact that most of their credit cards are maxed out anyway. Debt is also a symptom of the fear of doing without, even when carried to extremes. The fear of going without and the feelings of "being without" fancy clothes or expensive meals out is no less than the fear and experience of going without basic clothing and food, although the reality is different.

Working at a job you hate is nothing but fear - fear of not having enough, fear of quitting and not being able to find other work (or finding it and being stuck with something even worse), fear of not being to keep up with your "stuff habit" or your debt, fear of failure, fear of success, fear of relying on yourself, fear of doing things differently or out-of-the-box (running your own business, running off to Mexico, etc), fear of letting the family down, fear of "wasting" your education, fear of what other will say, think, fear that your mom/dad/sister/evil art teacher were right and so on.

Fear is the basis for pretty much all human suffering, not counting natural disasters and other acts of God. And the opposite of fear is love. Love creates an ecosphere of calm and plenty, because you know there is enough (if only just enough) and so feel no need to "get mine before someone else does." Nor do you feel the need to hoard (clutter) or gather in more than you can afford (debt) to assure yourself of plenty. In a world of love, all are accepted and loved for their own personal strengths and forgiven their faults, therefore negating the need for drowning in the comfort of stuff and food (debt and overweight), or worrying about what others will think if you quit your job to become a Mexican portrait painter (toxic job). And on and on.

Learn to live with love, for yourself and for others, even when they don't meet your standards (even the rich and awful deserve your love, for they serve their purpose, too). Creating a world of love is up to each of us. We cannot wait to see if others take the first step. They are waiting for us.

(c) Soni Pitts

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Soni Pitts is the Chief Visionary Butt-Kicker of SoniPitts.Com. She specializes in helping others reclaim "soul proprietorship" in their lives and to begin living the life their Creator always intended for them.

She is the author of the free e-book "50 Ways To Reach Your Goals" and over 100 self-help and inspirational articles, as well as other products and resources designed to facilitate this process of personal growth and spiritual development.


MORE RESOURCES:
This RSS feed URL is deprecated, please update. New URLs can be found in the footers at https://news.google.com/news


The Independent

Brits would be happier if they were paid an extra £508 per month, study finds
The Independent
A poll of 2,000 adults revealed money really can buy you happiness - but in contrary to common belief we don't need millions to put a smile on our faces. More than three quarters of those who took part said they would be happier if they had more money ...
You can put a price on happiness – and this is how much it isThe London Economic

all 2 news articles »


The Good Men Project (blog)

Defining Happiness in Three Countries
The Good Men Project (blog)
I created the brand to help people define their finish line, which is a lifestyle filled with happiness. Happiness is subjective. If you do not believe me, ask someone living in a different part of the world. Last month, I had an appointment with the ...



CNBC

How to 'unfollow' your way to success and happiness, according to guru Gabby Bernstein
CNBC
Though she's a guru who with a cult following who has been featured on Oprah and The Dr. Oz Show, Gabby Bernstein says she still suffers from judging others. That bad habit has made one of the most prominent self-help gurus in America right now unhappy ...



Third Class can't hide happiness on new album
Youngstown Vindicator
Third Class may be evolving as a band, but its music remains as personal and poetic as ever. The melodic Youngstown-based rockers consistently turn out beguiling collections of songs, and its new album, “Poem Idea,” is no different. The new release is ...



Nigeria Today

Six weeks after, Imo Ministry of Happiness has no office, staff
New Telegraph Newspaper
Barely six weeks after Governor Rochas Okorocha of Imo State established the Ministry of Happiness and Purpose Fulfillment headed by his sister, Ogechi Ololo, the ministry is yet to secure an office. Similarly, Ololo is yet to get additional staff ...
Six Weeks After, Imo Ministry Of Happiness Has No OfficeNigeria Today

all 3 news articles »


BBC News

Happiness Scrapbook: International journey to happiness
BBC News
And so the Happiness Scrapbook was born. Mark's first subject was a man who had inspired him throughout his life - his grandfather. He provided more than 10 minutes in response to the only question Mark asks any of his subjects: "What makes you happy ...

and more »


Salt Lake Tribune

Elizabeth Smart tells siblings rescued from Calif. home: 'There is happiness in the future'
KSL.com
"I would want them to know that they survived, they did it, and that life is not as dark and as terrible as it has been probably for their entire life," Smart said. "There is happiness in the future and they can go on to have wonderful lives. This does ...
Elizabeth Smart to California children allegedly kept prisoners by parents: 'There is happiness in the future'Salt Lake Tribune

all 6 news articles »


Ladders

Happiness hack: One ritual that made me much happier
Ladders
Since 1938, researchers have been following 724 men, tracking their physical health as well as social habits. Robert Waldinger, the study's current director, said in his recent TED Talk, “The clearest message that we get from this 75-year study is this ...



New York Post

The secret to happiness is shockingly mundane
New York Post
The ingredients to a happy life are something people spend their entire lives searching for, but new research reveals that they might be easier to find than previously thought. According to a new study, only one in four people would classify themselves ...



Marketing Interactive

Fortune Pharmacal rolls out 'happiness currency' to highlight the greatest wealth
Marketing Interactive
Hong Kong pharmaceutical company Fortune Pharmacal (幸福醫藥) has coined “happiness currency” (幸福多拿) to encourage people to submit and share their happy stories in a bid to rediscover the true meaning of “fortune” – and before you ask: no, it's not ...


Google News

home | site map
© 2007