There are many ways to be original these days. But unfortunately I cannot reveal any of these ways because the followers would then not be original, would they? Now, I realize that somewhere between one to two people would have followed the advice I gave, but just in case my calculations were off - and it turns out three would have followed - I need to be careful about what I write ?
One slogan which completely frustrates me due to its lack of originality is "got ____?" That's right - that lowercase phrase which was formerly synonymous with milk (and is now synonymous with everything) is so cliché that it's even cliché to write "got cliché?" But the worst is not behind us. The other day I saw a sign for an ATM machine that asked the question, "got cash?" This makes me wonder how far the slogan will extend before it finally fades. Here are five signs which I hope we never see, for any of them could mean the end of the world as we know it. And if it's the end of the world, how will we ever be able to celebrate the end of that slogan?
5. got goats? - I am not sure why this one would scare me. I guess it's something about selling goats to the mainstream that throws me off, or maybe I am afraid that too many far-sighted people will think it's an advertisement for coats. Either way, goats don't need to be a part of such a cliched scheme in order to be sold. That would be very baaaad. At least that's what a sheep told me.
4. got gas? - Just imagine the confusion. Those who need fuel in their cars would stop in order to fill their tanks. But what about those who just came back from the local Taco Bell? They don't need to be at a station where they can get gas. Rather, they need to be at a place where? Well, you get the picture.
3. got snot? - We don't need to be selling snot, let alone buying it. But if we are ever at a point where snot is something in which people become interested, let's not hold down the sales by asking people if they have it, because ultimately everybody does.
2. got my mother? - No..
1. got death? - If cemeteries start using this slogan, then we know the world has become too commercialized. Not only is it a morbid statement, but those who can answer in the affirmative will not even be given the opportunity to do so.
But I digress.
Greg Gagliardi is a teacher and writer. His stream-of-consciousness weekly humor column, "Progressive Revelations," has been ongoing since 1998. (http://www.ProgressiveRevelations.com)
Women Can Use Humor At Work, But They Should Follow This Advice Forbes
Now women can't be funny at work? New research suggests that using humor can help men at work, but that it can be harmful for women. Women who used ...
Using Humor, Food, and Femininity, Bobby Baker Creates an Art of Domesticity Hyperallergic
Baker's work utilizes food, families, and femininity to tell stories about women's imposed invisibility, and turns them into artwork. Lauren Moya Ford-237 minutes ...
Breast Cancer Isn't Funny, But Humor Can Heal Curetoday.com
Breast cancer. What do you think of when you hear or read those words? Do you feel sadness, anger, frustration, fear, worry, dread? Perhaps you felt several of ...
What Makes Flo From Progressive Effective? Lessons For Using Humor In Advertising. Forbes
The article offers insights into what makes humor in advertising work. Sean McBride or Arnold Worldwide and Professor Marc Weinberger are interviewed.
Walking food tour offers humor, history and hors d'oeuvres in downtown Lakeland The Ledger
Lkld Food Tours is a just-announced walking excursion created by Swan City Improv founder Nate Fleming that will have tourists sampling dishes at five of ...
The Origin Of The Word 'Humor' Science Friday
This is a part of Science Diction, a series digging into the scientific origin stories behind our words and language. Find all our stories and previous issues here.
Between humor and violence: Seno Gumiraâs quest for truth - The Jakarta Post Jakarta Post
Seno Gumira Ajidarma, took the opportunity to speak about the important role literature can play when a country goes through trying times during the Author of ...
Humor: Marvel creates new UCD-themed comic book, âThe Agents of Shields Libraryâ The Aggie
Ag-vengers, assemble! Superheros are all the rage these days. It's understandable why they're so popular. Companies like DC and Marvel ma.
Lori Lightfoot's new ad features her daughter, humor to woo voters Chicago Tribune
Lori Lightfoot's latest television ad features her daughter and humor as a way of attracting Chicago voters to her mayoral campaign.
7 Humor Websites You Should Be Reading :: Comedy :: Lists :: Humor Sites :: Paste Paste Magazine
It's a great time to be writing and reading online humor. In the years since The Onion went online in 1996, publications like McSweeney's and The New Yorker ...
Facebook users unleash mass humor to find woman's boyfriend at Epcot KEYT
It was a real-life 'Where's Waldo?' situation. Except, instead of Waldo, it was Regory Turco, and instead of a kid's magazine, Turco's girlfriend was searching for ...
Opinion: Louisville vs. Pitino in March Madness shows NCAA's sense of humor USA TODAY
Louisville and Chris Mack vs. Richard Pitino and Minnesota in the first round of the NCAA tournament. Subtext abounds, Tim Sullivan writes.
Chatological Humor (Mar. 26) Washington Post
Gene Weingarten brings you an update to his monthly Chatological Humor live chat.
Using Humor To Build A High-Performing Workplace Forbes
Humor can boost creativity, inclusion, and productivity. Tell some jokes, or at least share a Dilbert comic in your next email.
HMTC show mixes history, humor, fact and fiction Hanford Sentinel
HANFORD â Hanford audiences are discovering how important a pair of pants can be.
Getting AIs To Understand Humor May Improve Consumer Experience WFYI
While Siri and Alexa can tell jokes, they dont know why humans find things funny. But a Purdue University scientist hopes solving that problem will open new ...
Snatchers review: finding the humor in teen pregnancy and parasitic bug-monsters The Verge
Welcome to Cheat Sheet, our breakdown-style reviews of festival films, VR previews, and other special-event releases. This review comes from the 2019 SXSW ...
Chatological Humor (Mar. 19) Washington Post
Gene Weingarten brings you an update to his monthly Chatological Humor live chat.
See inside Selma Blair's Los Angeles home TODAY
Selma Blair shares a tour of her Los Angeles home with ArchDigest.com. See the pictures!
Ryan Fitzpatrick, with his mix of humor and reality, seems like a good fit for Miami at QB - The Athletic
Ryan Fitzpatrick, with his mix of humor and reality, seems like a good fit for Miami at QB The Athletic
Dolphins may benefit by "tanking for Tua" this fall, and some fans are worried that the new quarterback is actually too good.
The return of Andrew Bogut brings his unique sense of humor and mentorship back to the Warriors - The Athletic
The return of Andrew Bogut brings his unique sense of humor and mentorship back to the Warriors The Athletic
Andrew Bogut's old Warriors teammates heartily supported the idea of bringing back the sturdy center with a lively locker-room personality.
Fights give way to humor in long marriages Futurity: Research News
Disagreements that can mark the early and middle years of marriage mellow with age as conflicts give way to humor and acceptance, according to a new study.
Albert Einstein: Humor, happiness and everything in between Ladders
Albert Einstein happens to a perfect amalgamation of both descriptions; a singular, imaginative oddball dedicated to research and persistence.
Study suggests humor could be an emotion regulation strategy for depression PsyPost
Humor can help decrease negative emotional reactions in people vulnerable to depression, according to new research published in the journal Brain and ...
'Sense of Humor' The Japan Times
March 15-June 30 When art director Katsumi Asaba traveled around the world, he found that humor played an important role in his communication with others a.
Boyfriend lost at Epcot, Facebook users unleash mass humor to find him ABC Action News
ORLANDO, Fla. â It was a real-life 'Where's Waldo?' situation. Except, instead of Waldo, it was Regory Turco and instead of a kid's magazine, Turco's girlfriend ...
'Sweet Potato Queens' Southern humor and Broadway charm right at home at New Stage - Mississippi Today
'Sweet Potato Queens' Southern humor and Broadway charm right at home at New Stage Mississippi Today
The cast of âSweet Potato Queensâ includes (front, from left) Turner Crumbley as Daddy, Janine LaManna as Jill Conner Browne, Jolyne Shirley as Mama, and ...
Here's your dose of Irish humor â the corny kind Arizona Daily Star
The Irish pride themselves on their humor. And rightfully so. Some of the greatest wits were Irish: Jonathan Swift, Oscar Wilde, Brendan Behan, George Bernard ...
First look: New Apple ad uses humor to push privacy Axios
Your browser does not currently recognize any of the video formats available. Click here to visit our frequently asked questions about HTML5 video.
'I go out with a bang' | Lester Smith combines humor and love in writing his obituary KHOU.com
Longtime Houston philanthropist Lester Smith passed away last week. But he lives on through the words of his obituary, which was masterfully written in his own ...
Why humor is a powerful tool against depression Big Think
It's often said that all comedians are depressed, but new research has shown that there is indeed a link between depression and humor; humor helps depressed ...
Witty Women Are Less Likely to Get Promoted Than Men Pacific Standard
A new report finds that using humor in the workplace raises the status of male employees but has the opposite effect for women.
Minnich: Curb your sense of humor before you offend someone Carroll County Times
If you enjoy a good belly laugh now and then you'd better get it out of your system. It won't be long before there will be no chuckling tolerated because someone ...
Energy wildcatter was known for his humor, philanthropy Houston Chronicle
Lester Smith was a West Texas wildcatter and philanthropist, a championship ballroom dancer and practical joker, a two-time cancer survivor and double-lung ...
AUDIOBOOKS: Humor to beat the winter blues | theberkshireedge.com
Since everyone needs a chuckle once in a while, we've put together four humorous books to help you laugh away the winter blues. Still Foolin' 'Em: Where I've ...
Humor: Davis student uses Hydro Flask to fight off angry turkeys The Aggie
Turkeys gone wild Now I know you read the headline thinking this is some desperate attempt to promote the wildlife here at Davis or a smear.
Exploring the lighter side of Ichiro MLB.com
No one knows what's next for Ichiro Suzuki following the Mariners' two-game series with the A's in Japan this week. And if Ichiro knows, he's not telling anyone ...
With Warriors surrounded by turmoil, Kerr turns to humor NBCSports.com
Warriors coach Steve Kerr spent part of Monday afternoon assessing the state of his team and the internal fires that raged in a loss to the Suns on Sunday.
katsumi asaba brings his 'sense of humor' to 21_21 design sight exhibition Designboom
from now until june 30, 2019, tokyo's 21_21 design sight museum holds an exhibition entitled 'sense of humor' â directed by katsumi asaba.
Jimmy Carr mines humor from 'the horrors of the world' UPI News
Comedian Jimmy Carr spoke with UPI about his Netflix special, "The Best of Ultimate Gold Greatest Hits."
Conti Brings Subversive Puppet Humor To Theatre Festival KUNM
Women's Focus, 03/16 Noon: British actress and comedian Nina Conti comes to Albuquerque this week for two shows with the Tricklock Revolutions.
Making Jokes During a Presentation Helps Men But Hurts Women HBR.org Daily
Most people want to know how they can effectively present ideas and be persuasive at work. A common piece of advice for presentations and winning over ...
Deep stories and dark humor make up Forward Theater's 2019-20 season Madison.com
The upcoming season will include two Wisconsin premieres, a regional premiere by the author of âMarjorie Prime,â and a one-man play starring David Daniel.
Study finds humor is associated with positive outcomes in psychotherapy PsyPost
The presence of humor during therapy sessions is associated with improved outcomes, according to a new study published in The American Journal of ...
Senator Amy Klobuchar presents policy, humor Muscatine Journal
DAVENPORT â Speaking before a packed Davenport restaurant on Sunday afternoon, Minnesota Sen. Amy Klobuchar made her case to be the Democratic ...
Humor is both a hurdle and a gauge to improve AI, human interaction Phys.Org
Ask any smart virtual assistant to tell you a joke and the response is, well, lackluster. A flat, robotic voice drones out some simplistic humor. No laughter, no tone ...
Tony Capobianco wants you to find humor in the little things Vanyaland
Tony Capobianco has no idea what's going on. Admittedly, he's a self-proclaimed non-expert in most things, but what he does know is that it's important to take a ...
A new study explores humor in word embeddings Tech Xplore
Advances in the field of AI have enabled the development of tools that can understand a variety of languages and communicate with humans. However, there ...
Ohio transportation officials use highway sign humor for safety WJW FOX 8 News Cleveland
COLUMBUS, Ohio â The Ohio Department of Transportation is working to encourage drivers to stay safe and to smile. Drivers may have seen some of the ...
These 4 Zodiac Signs Have The Best Sense Of Humor & They'll Always Make You Laugh Elite Daily
You wanna know what my favorite cure for all human ailments is? Laughter, of course. Is there anything that a belly full of laughs can't alleviate? Even if ...
The best way to get to a climate couch potato? Humor. Bulletin of the Atomic Scientists
Editor's note: This story was originally published by Grist. It appears here as part of the Climate Desk collaboration. Last weekend on Instagram Live, ...
'Captain Marvel' blasts off with action, humor | Public Blair Enterprise Publishing
After years in the making, the time has come for the first female-led superhero film in the Marvel Cinematic Universe (MCU) in âCaptain Marvel.â
If Your Partner Doesn't Get Your Sense Of Humor, Here's How To Get Them Laughing Elite Daily
How important is it to you that you share a similar sense of humor with your partner? For me, it's essential that there be at least a fair amount of crossover, ...
The Importance of Being Earnest: Humor Writing Lodestone Book Riot
Want to see what humor writing should look like? Re-visit The Importance of Being Earnest.
How Marketing Can Save The World With Humor, Authenticity & Inspiration Demand Gen Report
Seventy-one percent of B2B marketers rate their company's overall *content* marketing success as zero to minimal, according to the *Content* Marketing Ins...
Dan Jenkins found humor in the truth when covering golf Minneapolis Star Tribune
ORLANDO, Fla. â Dan Jenkins only wanted to be a sports writer, even if that meant turning down the best player he ever saw. Jenkins told the story in 2012 ...
Cut Line: Eddie Pepperell finds humor, while Phil Mickelson finds frustration Golf Channel
In this week's edition, Eddie Pepperell makes his Cut Line debut thanks to his sharp play at the Arnold Palmer Invitational and even sharper wit, while Phil ...
Natural Language-Focused AI From OpenAI Shows Promise, Creates Stories With Humor Forbes
An AI research company called OpenAI may have developed the most advanced language-processing algorithm thus far. It is keeping it under wraps due to the ...
Louisville's Gregg Eisenberg highlights humor in the human condition Boulder Daily Camera
When sitting down with a stand-up philosopher, the boundary lines of conversation quickly expand to encompass a universe of concerns. Particularly if that man ...
Jimmy Lyons wins Mr. North Andover crown with humor and drama Eagle-Tribune
NORTH ANDOVER â A natural ability to make people laugh combined with theatrical flair propelled Jimmy Lyons to the crown in the Mr. North Andover pageant ...
Birth of Shas party recounted with humor, heart in 'The Unorthodox' - The Jewish News of Northern California
Birth of Shas party recounted with humor, heart in 'The Unorthodox' The Jewish News of Northern California
It's 1983, and ultra-Orthodox widower Yaakov Cohen is furious that his daughter has been expelled from her exclusive Jerusalem yeshiva because, as the ...
'What Men Want' Highlights Humor, Diversity Georgetown University The Hoya
âWhat Men Want,â the 2019 adaption of the early 2000s Mel Gibson film âWhat Women Want,â is a sharper, funnier, more inclusive take on the original concept.
Columbus Museum of Art showcases Dutch master works of beauty, humor The Columbus Dispatch
Life in the Age of Rembrandt: Masterpieces from the Dordrecht Museumâ â 50 paintings and 40 complementary artifacts â is on view through June 16.
Priests Find Themselves, and Their Sense of Humor, on Their New LP Nashville Scene
Huddled around drummer Daniele Daniele's cellphone in a Washington, D.C., practice space, the members of post-punk band Priests say they're thankful I'm ...
Maine East High School crowns Mr. Demon 2019 in annual, humor-filled pageant Chicago Tribune
Donning their best beachwear and demonstrating their talents in music, dance and martial arts, eight Maine East High School students vied for the title of Mr.
Matt Chats: Rob Guillory on Exploring His Roots, the Balance Between Horror and Humor, and Reinventing FARMHAND with Every Arc - Comics Beat
Matt Chats: Rob Guillory on Exploring His Roots, the Balance Between Horror and Humor, and Reinventing FARMHAND with Every Arc Comics Beat
Rob Guillory discusses how Farmhand ups the ante with its next volume, his desire to keep reinventing the series, and what makes it so personal.
Warm up with cold humor Port Townsend Leader
We've had more snow around here lately than in many years. Stores closed, no mail, etc. But, as my wife keeps pointing out, it's nothing compared to what we ...
Worcester Recovers comedy show brings healing power of humor Worcester Telegram
WORCESTER - Addiction isn't funny. But two Worcester-area brothers have found that laughter can be good medicine for recovery. On March 21, Worcester's ...
Eileen Myles poetry reading brings humor, heart to Brooks-Rogers The Williams record
âI guess I'm an art writer and poet tonight,â deadpanned Eileen Myles, before breaking into a wide grin for a packed house in Brooks-Rogers Recital Hall last ...
Rachel Vellenga | Author uses humor to address serious issues Champaign/Urbana News-Gazette
By RACHEL VELLENGA. Reading "Everything's Trash, But It's Okay" by Phoebe Robinson is like having a conversation with your funniest and coolest friend on ...
Einsteinâs brilliance, humor and literal connection to Israel revealed in manuscripts - Sun Sentinel
Einsteinâs brilliance, humor and literal connection to Israel revealed in manuscripts Sun Sentinel
Just in time for Albert Einstein's 140th birthday, Hebrew University reveals the *content* of newly acquired manuscripts.
Beto OâRourke Rocked by Scandal as High-School Mixtape Appears to Include REO Speedwagon - The New Yorker
Beto OâRourke Rocked by Scandal as High-School Mixtape Appears to Include REO Speedwagon The New Yorker
Andy Borowitz jokes that the discovery of a high-school-era mixtape featuring a song by the band REO Speedwagon poses a threat to the Presidential ...
Doris Kearns Goodwin Opens Festival With Optimism, Humor, Insight Boca Raton
For presidential historian Doris Kearns Goodwin, who opened the 13th-annual Festival of the Arts Boca last night at the Mizner Park Amphitheater, her return ...
Turnbull remembered for humor, friendship | Free Emporia Gazette
Longtime Roberts-Blue-Barnett owner Mike Turnbull is being remembered for his generosity, friendship and dedication to the community.
Coping with surveillance: Kindness, humor, and prayers always work- ucanews.com UCA News
Always stay alert. One unpleasant and scary consequence of being involved in human rights activities is being surveilled. However, being here, one simply ...
Albert Einstein's brilliance, humor and literal connection to Israel JNS.org
Just in time for his 140th birthday, Hebrew University reveals the *content* of newly acquired manuscripts.
Movie review: Biopic 'Fighting with My Family' mixes heart, humor... Duluth News Tribune
If you ever wanted to know about moving up the pro wrestling ranks, Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson's got you covered. The wrestler-turned-actor produced ...
Thomas Rhett on Heaven, Haters, Humor CMT.com
Thomas Rhett's brand new song âLook What God Gave Herâ is not the first time he's looked to his wife Lauren for inspiration. But I do think it's the first time he has ...
âBrooklyn Nine-Nineâ joins #MeToo movement with humor and heart San Francisco Chronicle
A man's penis is broken, and he has only himself to blame. Thus began the Thursday, Feb. 28, episode of âBrooklyn Nine-Nine,â which recently moved to NBC ...
Acoustic Duo Ryanhood Brings Virtuosity, Heart and Humor to Barnesville at the Albert S. George Youth Center - The Columbus Dispatch
Acoustic Duo Ryanhood Brings Virtuosity, Heart and Humor to Barnesville at the Albert S. George Youth Center The Columbus Dispatch
Named "Best Group/Duo" in the 2014 International Acoustic Music Awards, acoustic duo Ryanhood got their first break more than a decade ago as street ...
TV Review: Ricky Gervais uses humor to cope with death in 'After Life' Colorado Springs Gazette
Cast: Ricky Gervais (âThe Office,â âDerekâ), David Bradley (âGame of Thronesâ), Tony Way (âEdge of Tomorrowâ), Tom Basden (âPlebsâ), Kerry Godliman ...
ASU's election-themed 'Tartuffe' tells an age old story with humor Montgomery Advertiser
Alabama State University's Department of Theatre presents a modern adaption of Moliere's "Tartuffeâ by Robert Caisley at 7 p.m. nightly on March 13-16 ...
Humor: A definitive take on the best water fountains at UC Davis The Aggie
As a Davis student, countless factors of student life breach the veil of background noise into coherent, active thought on a daily basis. So, when I say that ...
HUMOR: Student reserves study room, won't leave The Washtenaw Voice
Aina Zaidi Contributor. Students have recently noticed Paul, 18, has a habit of locking himself in a study room at 11:20 a.m. every weekday at WCC, which is ...
Jokes on You: Trevor Noah Trolls Oscars Audience With Xhosa Humor NBC 10 Philadelphia
Talk about an inside joke. When comedian and âDaily Showâ host Trevor Noah went on stage at the Oscars to introduce best picture nominee âBlack Panther,â ...
From his service to his humor to his family, Jimmy Hart was a picture of early Boise - Idaho Statesman
From his service to his humor to his family, Jimmy Hart was a picture of early Boise Idaho Statesman
The saloon owner and volunteer firefighter constantly kept people abreast of his goings-on with items in the Statesman.
Travels with Charlie: Cheap attempt at humor about Alamo not appreciated Reading Eagle
Call me a stodgy stick-in-the-mud curmudgeon. I can take it. What I can't take is the mockery of history. When I am not writing travel stories, I am.
Good Boys Review: Maturely Childish Comedy with Humor & Heart /FILM
In our Good Boys review, /Film contributor Matt Donato examines the new comedy from The Office veterans Gene Stupnitsky and Lee Eisenberg.
"The Humans" at the Unicorn Balances Humor and Dread kcstudio.org
The Humansâ runs through March 31 at the Unicorn Theatre, 3828 Main St. Call 816-531-7529 or go to www.unicorntheatre.org.
Five artists tap into the humor and rage of Philip Guston The Missoulian
In pop music, there's a tradition of covering previous songs by influential artists. Many of the best covers, or at least the most memorable ones, take the raw ...
Hayes Carll on Harnessing Humor, Dance-Hall Vibe of New Album 'What It Is' Rolling Stone
For someone so well known for his storytelling, Hayes Carll is a man of few words. Either that or a chronic self-editor: Speaking slowly and carefully, with long, ...
Humor Heals Curetoday.com
By joking about her cancer diagnosis, one survivor hopes to raise awareness and help people find laughter.
UW alum's comedy documentary searches for humor in world's most dangerous places - The Badger Herald
UW alum's comedy documentary searches for humor in world's most dangerous places The Badger Herald
University of Wisconsin alum Aaron Ohlmann recently produced a new original documentary Netflix series, âLarry Charles' Dangerous World of Comedy.
Humor: Little Caesar's celebrates Ides of March with collectible knives stabbed into every pizza - The Aggie
Humor: Little Caesar's celebrates Ides of March with collectible knives stabbed into every pizza The Aggie
What's better than getting a large pepperoni pizza to celebrate the brutal murder of history's favorite dictator? Getting a free knife as well! That's right, the brains ...
Teacher uses humor to âtrickâ students into learning WREX-TV
ROCKFORD (WREX) â Brian Maier is a history, economics, and business law teacher at Guilford High School. He uses his wit and humor to capture students ...
Longtime DuTrac CEO remembered for service, humor | Tri-state News telegraphherald.com
For Tom Sarvis, community *service* was no joke. The longtime CEO of DuTrac Community Credit Union also was an active volunteer, serving on multiple boards ...
Vaudeville, Percussion and Humor with 'Things That Go Ding!'' Shepherd Express
Skylight's Michael âDingâ Lorenz offers a light-hearted performance with percussions in Things that Go Ding!
Presidential campaign humor to help you through a gray Monday The Progressive Pulse
[Editor's note: Bestselling author and columnist Celia Rivenbark (that's her at left) has been kind enough to make her regular column available to NC Policy ...
Steve Kerr Resorts to Humor to Control Damage With Warriors in Turmoil NBC Bay Area
With players unavailable, Warriors coach Steve Kerr spent part of Monday afternoon assessing the state of his team and the internal fires that raged in a loss to ...
An Over the Top Blood Fest: Reflecting on the Violence and Humor of the Cult Wii Game 'MadWorld' - Bloody Disgusting
An Over the Top Blood Fest: Reflecting on the Violence and Humor of the Cult Wii Game 'MadWorld' Bloody Disgusting
During its time the Nintendo Wii was an incredible console that grew to include a vast library of terrific games. While the Wii was home to loads of family.
Used Condom Found In Restaurant Salad Bar; Waiter Embarrassed To Tears
Evidence of after-hours activity turned up at a Big Boy restaurant salad bar in Detroit last week, embarrassing not only the perpetrators, but nearly everyone associated with the company.Apparently, Mike Finney and Rhonda Carrion were working together to close down the restaurant's soup, salad and dessert bar and, with no one else around, culminated a night of flirting with sexual intercourse right on the bar.
Silver Linings Are Everywhere
Viagra. That one word packs a lot of punch.
Saturday morning. I went, in the early morning, to the farmer's market to get our supply of fruits and veggies, leaving Sandra to sleep in.
New Orleans First to Experience Housing Bubble Burst
Are we starting to see the Housing Bubble Burst in the wake of Hurricane Katrina? In New Orleans many homeowner's had their equity literally washed away. They are upside down in negative equity and basically underwater.
[Not So] Outgoing Mail
I am currently perplexed by the concept of outgoing mail. I mean, I understand it in theory, but today I tried talking to it and it didn't even respond.
When Humans and Dogs Collide: Negotiations for Todays Changing Times
This morning I decided to find myself. I originally looked forward to the spiritual journey that would define who I was as a person.
Maybelle Misfire Joins Mega Corp
To: Maybelle Misfire From: I. M.
Internet is My True Agent
You know the type -- that doodling type. Every time there is a pen and paper on the table, they will be sketching something down, with a mysterious smile, giggling quietly and making funny faces.
The Language of Appalachia
Imagine my surprise when I went to Jamaica a few years ago and learned that I do, indeed, have an accent. You see, unlike my paternal grandmother, I don't stretch the word "cornbread" into four syllables.
American Independence - The True Story
It was late in 1775, and King George III was at Buckingham Palace, sitting in reflective mood on his commode. His 13 year old son Prince George (yes, they were very imaginative with their names, those royal types), was sitting on the floor nearby, otherwise occupied with the 18th century equivalent of Game Boy: a model soldier with a rifle sat on a model elephant, shooting at a model tiger two planks of wood away.
Valet Parking: Theft with Consent
This column is long overdue. To put it in library terms, which I guess I already did (but I'd like to elaborate), this column is like checking out a book in 1998 but not returning it until yesterday.
Poor Rixs Almanac 8-27-05
Hey, Poor Rix: What do you think about school food? - Former StudentPoor Rix ate lunch at a school last week, and really liked it. Who knew they could make a dessert out of corn chips?Fact is, Poor Rix enjoyed everything about school, except for the "study" part.
Restaurant Manager Gives Out Sexual Favors As Performance Bonus, Raise
While many restaurant workers worry and sweat in anticipation of an imminent job-related performance review, employees at Applebee's in Westland have adopted an entirely different attitude toward the employment evaluation process. This is due in no small part to the fact that the general manager, Lisa Blanco, rewards superior employee performance the old fashion way.
There are many ways to be original these days. But unfortunately I cannot reveal any of these ways because the followers would then not be original, would they? Now, I realize that somewhere between one to two people would have followed the advice I gave, but just in case my calculations were off - and it turns out three would have followed - I need to be careful about what I write ?One slogan which completely frustrates me due to its lack of originality is "got ____?" That's right - that lowercase phrase which was formerly synonymous with milk (and is now synonymous with everything) is so cliché that it's even cliché to write "got cliché?" But the worst is not behind us.
Norm Goldman Interviews Comedienne Fran Capo,the Guinness Book Worlds Record for the Fastest Talking
Today, Norm Goldman, Editor of Sketchandtravel & Bookpleasures is delighted to have as a guest, Fran Capo.Fran is quite a "cool person," as she is an eight-time author, humorist, voiceover artist, comedienne, adventurer, actress, freelance writer and keynote motivational speaker.
Sell [Your] Phones
Today while driving I saw a young girl, probably around 11 years old, on a cell phone. She was walking along the side of the street talking to someone, and I couldn't help but think that maybe she was talking to someone across the street because she wasn't allowed to cross it.
Stopping Bad Breath Bart
"Pee-ew! You smell like a skunk soaking in sardine nectar for a week." OK, so I can be a little candid every now and then.
Bed Bugs Bite
I just turned on the news a minute ago and wondered why there weren't news flashes regarding when -- and perhaps where -- people are turning on the news. Sometimes it is a slow news week, and there's not much to read in Newsweek, so maybe this could take up some space.
3 Surefire Ways To Combat Rising Gas Prices
I have heard the rumblings of many of you in Readerland about the recent spike in gasoline prices. In fact it's all I seem to hear about lately.
When It Rains, It Pours: Creating a Plan
It's time for me to announce that I have a lot of skeletons in my closet. I keep them there to stop people from stealing my jackets.
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